New Year. Fresh Start. Pursuit.

It's a new year. Time for a fresh start. In addition to going through the book "A Call to Die" and fasting from facebook, I'm also going through our church's booklet that has daily Bible reading. By the end of the year, I will have read the entire Bible. I'm truly excited to begin this journey! I know it won't always be easy, especially on those days where I claim to be "too busy." But I heard from someone this past year that if "you're too busy for God, you're busier than God ever intended for you to be." That really hit home for me. So these past few days as I've been going through "A Call to Die" I felt God calling me to give up watching TV at home. I realized that by giving up facebook, all I did was replace that time with TV rather than using it to pursue Christ. So here I am, spending an hour each day going through "A Call to Die" and now an extra forty five minutes reading through the Bible (using my study Bible to better comprehend it brings that forty five minutes up to about an hour and fifteen). This is more time with the Lord each day than I've ever done before! Not to mention I've been off school for the past week, so it's been easier to find time than it usually is. My fear comes when school starts up tomorrow. I'm worried that I'll be exhausted from school and homework, that I'll have no desire to read my Bible....it's like another book to my reading list.

But with this new year, my determination has sky rocketed! Oh, and I also discovered our local library...let me tell you, I'm gonna start living there! It's so peaceful and spacious that I can spread my stuff out all over a table and get straight to work. It's pretty awesome! (I think I've just earned the 'nerd' title, but I think I'm okay with that.) But anyways, my goal is that I'll be able to stay organized and stay focused. In my mind, my typical school day looks something like this:
5:00-- wake up. shower. Bible reading. get ready.
6:45--leave for school
7:25-1:50--school
1:50--head to the libray to finish any homework
4:00--hopefully get home before or around now
4:00-4:30--much needed nap/free time
5:00--start cooking dinner
6:00--eat dinner
7:00-8:00--head to the Y to workout
8:00-9:00--devotions
9:00--get ready for bed and hopefully be in bed before or
          around 10
...sounds crazy right? Don't worry, reading over that--it'll be a miracle if I can actually pull that off for even a week. I'm hoping my mom will actually cook once or twice, and I'll have some days without homework so I'd just come straight home. I still need my social life and time outside of my house. I guess my thought process right now is that I desperately need Christ to be the center of my life. Looking back, I was always claiming to be too busy for Christ or I was just too lazy and had no desire to be in the word. I hope that with the new year that will change. The things of this world are temporary and can only provide temporary satisfaction. I want what God wants for me. I have to be honest though, God's plan can seem scary or maybe even impossible sometimes. I want to question Him and say "God, do you know how lazy I am? Do you realize that I'm not always outgoing, but I have shy moments? Do you really think you can use me?"  But I'm sure God just smiles and laughs at how much I doubt myself.

New Year's Eve, I was able to be a part of a really in-depth conversation with Pastor Joe. We had questions purtaining to things like "if God knows we're gonna sin ahead of time and He has control, why doesn't He stop us?" or "How do I know if I'm truly saved? What if I think I'm saved but I wasn't predestined?"  Pastor Joe had such good answers, and all of them he pulled straight from the Bible. He knows his stuff so well and I look up to him more than a lot of people! The bottom line to his answers though was that "God knows everything. A lot of things we will never understand because if we understood it all, there would be no mystery to God." I must admit that I truly enjoy learning new things and having my eyes opened. Initially I was frustrated with Pastor Joe's response because I like set answers. I like to know what's going on without any confusion; but that's not how God intended it, and who am I to question God's sovereignty?

So there you have it. That's what I've been learning over the last few days. I'm growing so much in my faith already and that's super exciting for me! I hope that what I share doesn't bore any of you. If you ever have questions feel free to ask. I do enjoy writing these blogs, but your questions and comments make it even more exciting :)  I'm still praying that God would use this blog for His glory, that others would come to know Him, or desire to know Him even more!
                                                                   ~Julie